Marsupial with a fetish

Due to post-hurricane limited-internet-access crisis, I present this story from Digital Spy in its entirety without comment:

A kangaroo named Benji reportedly angered several neighbours in Prague after he was caught 'stealing' their underwear.

The 2-year-old marsupial is said to have escaped his owner before hopping over several gardens. He was only caught after a neighbor spotted him jumping away with his loot of lingerie.

Benji's owner had already reported him missing to police, but a spokesperson revealed that separate calls of stolen clothing were not linked at first.

"We had a call from Benji's owner saying his pet kangaroo had escaped," the spokesman said. "At the same time we started getting reports of a number of thefts from washing lines.

"We didn't think they could possibly be related until he was caught red-handed."

Benji's owner Petr Hlabovic, 35, said: "I'm very relieved to have him back. I've got no idea what he thought he was up to - he certainly didn't pick up the habit from me."

Photo of the culprit reluctantly being taken into custody from Metro.

You're never too old to stand up to bad animals

Phyllis Johnson had not only lived peaceably with kangaroos for all of her 94 years, she'd even occasionally done them a favor.

"I used to feed them next door, give them some bread," the Australian woman told the Courier-Mail, "and they've always been so gentle."

But when a male red kangaroo came looking for trouble when she was hanging out the laundry in her backyard, neither her age nor her history of consideration toward his species meant anything to him.

"It was taller than me and it just ploughed through the clothes on the washing line straight for me," she said.

The animal knocked her over and kicked her, but the young hooligan had picked the wrong old lady to mess with. She fought back.

"I happened to have a broom nearby and I just started swinging at it. I bashed it on the head but it kept going for me, not even the dog would help, it was too frightened."

Johnson succeeded in crawling away and escaping into her home, where she waited while the animal continued to rage outside. Her son arrived, and, unable to drive the beast away with a stick, called police.

The roo was unimpressed by their authority and went for the two officers as well. Thinking quickly, one of them tried an unconventional counterattack: he sprayed the creature with his pepper spray.

Using pepper spray on wildlife isn't a standard part of police training, even in Australia where it seems like nearly all the animals can kill you and they probably need all the help they can get. But the unconventional approach was effective - in the sense that the beast's attack was diverted towards the other officer. Fortunately, he was armed with the spray as well.

Wildlife officers finally captured the attacker, who was reportedly being examined by a vet before a decision was made about his fate. We can only hope, after reading of this animal's merciless victimization of the elderly, that psychological exams are included.

Although it has to be said that Johnson hardly sounds helpless and frail. Despite being bruised and bleeding, she had to be persuaded to go to the hospital.

"My son made me," she said. "I'm okay, although the roo took a chunk of flesh out of my leg and there's a chance they'll have to operate."

Photo of sign that has got the problem exactly backwards by Flickr user The Rohit.

Marsupials interfere with cherished tradition

For 125 years there's been a race on Australia Day on the track at picturesque Hanging Rock. This year a crowd of around five thousand had gathered to watch the Hanging Rock Cup, one of only two races run on the site each year.

But the crowd was not made up only of humans, and that's where the trouble started.

"Country race meetings, kangaroos, barbecues - that's what Australians are all about, isn't it?" Hanging Rock Racing Club manager Mark Graham told a reporter. And, he said, the roos usually stay behind the fence after being "encouraged out" by the staff.

But this year, "encouragment" wasn't enough to keep the mob in its place. Despite the construction of a higher fence last year to prevent just this problem, six roos cleared it and took over the track.

"We tried to gently usher them out but they just kept coming back. They're so friendly with humans that they wanted to mingle," Graham said, making it entirely unclear whose side he is actually on.

The invasion forced the cancellation of the race, although one kangaroo gave an idea of what it apparently thinks is a more appropriate sporting event for Australian spectators:

One kangaroo wowed the crowd with a dash down the home straight.

"This kangaroo hopped right down the straight from about the 350 mark, past the winning post," Mr Graham said.

The crowd is reported to have cheered, a huge mistake in the opinion of this blog. Do you really want to encourage them?

Kangaroo pervert commits cross-species harassment

Perhaps naming the area "the Honeymoon Ranges" gave one kangaroo the idea that it was the right place to look for love. But the human females of Australia are understandably less than thrilled with the attention. The Northern Territory News reports:

One resident who walks along the bike track to the Mary Ann Dam regularly said she realised she was being followed early one morning.

"I turned around and saw this big kangaroo behind me, so I hastened my steps," she said.

"It seemed a bit odd, but I continued walking and didn't think much about it.

"Then on the return walk he was there waiting for me," she said.

"With his male pride on full alert, he started circling me.

"There was no doubt about what he wanted, the randy old thing.

"It was a huge kangaroo and quite intimidating.

"I yelled at him to go away, waved my hands about and let him know I wasn't interested, but he was persistent - I'll give him that."

The kangaroo was also reported to have approached the crowd at an evening car race and chatted up a woman who approached him thinking he was just "a cute, friendly kangaroo."

Tanya was oblivious to the amorous nature of the interlude, but the kangaroo's intentions were clearly evident to other speedway fans.

"Yeah, apparently he was quite aroused," she said.

"I'm actually glad I didn't notice."

She got off easy, but let's hope the women of Australia take a lesson from this. For safety's sake, better assume animals are guilty until proven "cute and friendly," not the other way around.


Rude kangaroo by Flickr user Dan Taylor.